Sunday, May 16, 2010

If we didn't make money, would we still be valued? -Updated

A very bright, well qualified and experienced colleague quit her job and while leaving she said, "I hope my husband supports me in every way and takes care of me". Her words really rang a bell and all of us women were suddenly plagued by that thought. What if we quit our job and made no money, will we still lead the life we lead now? Will the quality of our lifestyle suffer? Will we be treated any differently or looked at in a different way?As women these are important thoughts/fears for us...and of course none of us girls had any definite answers!

Thanks to our good education, we have cushy jobs and make good money. We can buy almost anything within our reach and catches our fancy. Most of us do not depend on our husbands to finance our needs. We are independent women, taking several decisions. We are equal providers and care takers in the house and family. Today working women are on an equal footing in terms of finance with the husbands...But what if tomorrow the equation gets lop sided?

Today, I pay hefty EMIs for the house and my car. I buy new clothes, shoes, bags, cosmetics whenever I want to. I make my own investments. I buy my own tickets to fly back to my mom's place as and when I wish to. I can buy expensive gifts for my husband on special occasions. I can help my family if the need arise. Basically, the possibilities that come with financial freedom are many and to think if all this came to end one day, where would that leave us?

Would our husbands feel the pinch and crib about it? Will they start shouldering all the responsibilities that we earlier shared? Would they happily take over our EMIs? Would we still be able to shop and will all our needs be taken care of happily? Will we still get the same security, love, and affection without any nagging and arguing? Above all, will we be respected and valued as partners. Again, the questions are many and most of us just wonder what it would be like to be on the other side and how we would make that transition.

I believe that a good education, career, and financial freedom should be prime for all women. Believe me, marriage and family can wait! There are too many sad stories out there where women are mistreated by husbands and in laws and such women have nothing to fall back on and often end up at the mercy of the husband and his family. (TBG shared some real life stories of women who are going through very difficult times- 1 and 2).

Girls, all of us need jobs and need to be financially independent and save for any calamity. Life is unpredictable and the best placed people can face severe odds. We all need to be respected and valued for who we are. Sadly, money has become the most important factor based on which society values and gives importance to people. But, so be it...we have to beat the system and come out with our heads held high up!