Monday, November 9, 2009

C'mon boys, grow up!

There is this reality show on Star - Perfect Bride, where eligible bachelors along with their moms are on the show choosing the perfect bride for themselves. I just happened to see 2 episodes and what a shame!

We have the mama's boys with their dominating moms who are the ones deciding their bahus and the qualities that their bahu should have...and of course our so eligible hot bachelors are all like - mumma ki pasand meri pasand...mumma ne bola hai toh wahi mera bhi kehna! Gosh! when are our Indian boys gonna grow up! Dude! wake up!! You are the one who has to marry...your moms have had their days. Get yourself a life and a spine to start with! And come to think of it, you must be such loosers that you ended up on a TV show to catch a bride for yourself, all certified and stamped by your moms! Anyway..good luck! (Many of us, specially the men may say- whats wrong with that! I say Ok, nothing...go ahead :)

Now, im so confused, what exactly is the Indian male looking for in a girl today? (well, not all of you out there..but there are quite a few specimens).  I can understand the guys, who are clear in their head- all they want is only a perfect housekeeper to help their moms at home and raise kids. Nothing more...great! good for you and pity the girl, unless of course this is her choice also and this what she wanted.

But, surprisingly a lot of educated young men say they want an educated, professional, independent, beautiful, homely, adjusting, and caring girl! (Did i also hear convent educated?..Duh!) Now, these are the guys who seriously leave me confused, really confused! So, what creature are these guys looking for? Homosapien? Woman? Superwoman? Jadoo? Hmm..escapes me...

At the end of the day this variety of men are looking girls who will listen to their moms and say haanjee mummmyji, raise the kids, look after the home, cook delicious food, adjust with every tom, dick, and harry, and work outside, and be selfless, and give in to him and his family! Dude!! what are you thinking?? Did you ever think, that women might have a mind and a heart of their own and may not give in to you and your families way of life and thoughts and demands? Did you ever think she might not be interested in the kitchen or socialising with your relatives, because she might be too tired after her long day at work? Did you realise she was human like you? Did you ever think you might be killing her dreams and desires by burdening her with your and your families expectations? Did you ever think you are expecting too much?

Today, many of us teach our daughters to be strong, independent, and make their own choices and decisions in life. So, isn't it natural that when she gets married she will want to have her own seperate home with her husband, run it the way she wants to, live life how she has desired to, take small and big decisions for her home? Why do we forget that women might not like to be burdened with expectations, or might not like joint families, which is already disintegrating very fast. Many free thinking women who chart their own lives, set up nuclear households, take their own decisions, sometimes face family issues and criticism. Now, how sad is that. Isn't this opposite of what we taught them- to be independent? Are we not killing their dreams and right to live happily.

All that women are looking for is just a chance to live their lives and dreams in their own live in peace and love and be loved. Let us not forget there is nothing wrong in a woman demanding the right to lead her life the way she wants to and decide what she wants to do. Indian men, its you turn to wake up and smell the coffee. Women are going way ahead and you need to do some catching up. Get real and decide on what you really want. Usually you can get this or that type or some bit of this and some bit of that...but you cant have it all. Looking for a perfect bride, then just leave it to your mom :) but, if little imperfect would do, that might just make your life happier and complete, then go out and find one for yourself. You will not regret it :)

Got this in my email :)


  1. I so agree with you. Most guys do need a reality check. I sometimes think they are scared of being independent lest they fall - so the safest bet is do as mommy dear says!!!

  2. he he
    thats why am telling you
    stay unmarried stay out of trouble
    but you are already out of clan :-)

  3. The poem is perfect. Sounds just right. I have never seen the Perfect Bride and now I doubt I will.

  4. he he
    yaar some of the lines were like a slap on my face..
    i m the most confused guy in wat i want out of a girl..

    but bahut sahi likha hai aapne...
    keep posting

  5. the show is jus the mtv twitter should b called "desperate to be housewives"..
    nice post..:)