Monday, November 2, 2009

Life lessons from Dadajaan

I lost my granpa a few months ago. He left me with many memories, which will stay with me forever. Of all the things I have learnt from him, these are special and it is important to me that I document them.

1) I learnt that we must touch each others lives in such a way that we are remembered for it.
Dadajaan, always said, - beta do some small thing for us when you come visiting us, so that when you go away we remember you everyday and say - When Maria was here, she used to do this for us. The small jobs he would entrust me would be giving dadijaan her medicines every night, or giving them a glass of water in the night while going to sleep, or just switching off the light when they have gone to bed.
Sometimes I have done these things, other times I have brushed these jobs away...but now I realize how important these small things were and how much they matter. I really did learn it is important to touch lives and leave a mark. I did learn how small things bring people closer to each other, bind us, and how they help us relate to each other and care for each other.

2) I learnt, it is important to call our special ones lovingly.
Granpa was a polite person and always stressed on using a loving salutation. He introduced me to using the word jaan. So he was Dadajaan for me. So, there was dadijaan, nanajaan, and nanijaan too. Their faces would light up with happiness when we would call them that way :) It would be a special moment to see them happy and smile.
I learnt that it makes a world of difference when we call our special people lovingly. These words effortlessly convey such a warm feeling of love and care. I learnt that words bind us all and the words we use grow on us and shape our feelings and us. Kind words evoke a feeling of love and kindness and help us reciprocate in a similar fashion. How important that is today!

3) I learnt that it is important to express oneself.
Every summer when I would visit them, Dadajaan, would say - beta everyday write a bit on what you did and how you felt. He said it was an enriching experience to express ourself and document our life, thoughts, and feelings and revisit them if we wanted to. So, when I would be there I would write a bit each day in my diary. He would read it with a big smile and talk to me about all that i had written. Sometimes, we would laugh, sometimes we would discuss and I would see reason.
Yes, he taught me that it was important to document our life and thoughts in some way. It was important to revisit them sometimes and see how we think and how far we have gone ahead in life. It helps us to stay rooted and see and analyze life in all its shades. This also made me see the importance of leaving behind a real story for the future generation to simple read or learn from. After dadajaan passed away, I read a few of his diaries that has his life documented in such a rich way. It really is a treasure to cherish that tells the story of a man, his life and times.

I think, sometimes, we just do not realize what we have till it is taken away from us. But, I guess as long as we realize and learn its all worthwhile. He taught me some important life lessons effortlessly by telling me simple things. His words were nothing out of the ordinary, but carried a great message for me.
Thank you for everything dadajaan. A bit of you, lives in me.


  1. Grandparents are the best. I lost the last surviving grandparent earlier this year and I know nothing can replace the loss.

  2. Grandparents have the experience of life.During their life time,we tend to ignore their advice.
    No one can equal the GPs.

  3. Srry for your loss
    I never had such relation with my grandpa :-)
    but still I can feel the loss
    one not only do but be a god of small things now...............because I totally agree with you grandpa in this matter.........

  4. Yes, GPs are irreplaceable and nothing nothing can make up for their loss and their words and what they have meant to us. Yes, I do agree that during their lifetime, we tend to ignore their advice and have our own philosophies in life, but a lot of us later have realized how true the words of GPs and parents were. But, I guess its all a part of growing up and learning :)

  5. wow.. thank you for sharing this.. reminds me of my grandfather too.. he was a gem and i still miss him.. even after all these years..

  6. There is a hadith, perhaps in Sahi Bukhari.
    If a believer dies and atleast four people discuss and remember him for his good deeds, he will surely enter the JANNAT.
    AZIZ-UR-REHMAN dada was such a person.
    Myself, Akmal, Saem and Nadeem have remembered him and the moments spend with him so many times after his passing to the eternal world.

    Whenever punctuality of time is discussed, the first person who come in my mind is DADA jaan.Even 4-5 days ago, when I was in Bangalore, I kept remebering him with Nadeem for hours.