I'm a big girl...I can change tyres!

Yes, yes, yes! I can change tyres. Thanks to my 2 buddies from work, I finally learnt to do that job (Guys, that lunch i promised is soon coming your way). Im so kicked, not many women know how to do that stuff...im so proud!! I can now picture myself changing a flat tyre next time im stuck on the road. Cool na!
This has to be the single achievement I made in the last many many weeks...im not going anywhere at work, so good for me this came along :)

I had a flat tyre and somehow I just didnt realise and i had been driving around with that flat tyre for the last 2 days! yea, imagine! The security guard at the office parking lot told me, madam aapka do din se tyre phissss hai...and i was like - really!!?? The drivers standing there had a good laugh...they too had been watchign me for the last 2 days...flat tyre wali madam aa gayi!!! Duh! how stupid! I felt like an ass, standing there, staring unbelievably at the flat tyre!! how could I not notice it! I will think mayb tubeless tyres makes life easy. Who knows.

Anyway, P & R from office helped unscrew, fix the jack, put the bolts in place...and all the good stuff...and i followed them carefully and tried my hand at the job. Boy! I hadn't given that much attention to anything...yea Ranbir Kapoor is a different story..that guy is going places i tell you. Ok, thats a different story...forget that bit!

Ok, so im gonna brag about this endlessly with all details to any and every ear that comes in my line of sight! Consider yourself warned friends!

This pic from world war 2 is so cool!

C'mon boys, grow up!

There is this reality show on Star - Perfect Bride, where eligible bachelors along with their moms are on the show choosing the perfect bride for themselves. I just happened to see 2 episodes and what a shame!

We have the mama's boys with their dominating moms who are the ones deciding their bahus and the qualities that their bahu should have...and of course our so eligible hot bachelors are all like - mumma ki pasand meri pasand...mumma ne bola hai toh wahi mera bhi kehna! Gosh! when are our Indian boys gonna grow up! Dude! wake up!! You are the one who has to marry...your moms have had their days. Get yourself a life and a spine to start with! And come to think of it, you must be such loosers that you ended up on a TV show to catch a bride for yourself, all certified and stamped by your moms! Anyway..good luck! (Many of us, specially the men may say- whats wrong with that! I say Ok, nothing...go ahead :)

Now, im so confused, what exactly is the Indian male looking for in a girl today? (well, not all of you out there..but there are quite a few specimens).  I can understand the guys, who are clear in their head- all they want is only a perfect housekeeper to help their moms at home and raise kids. Nothing more...great! good for you and pity the girl, unless of course this is her choice also and this what she wanted.

But, surprisingly a lot of educated young men say they want an educated, professional, independent, beautiful, homely, adjusting, and caring girl! (Did i also hear convent educated?..Duh!) Now, these are the guys who seriously leave me confused, really confused! So, what creature are these guys looking for? Homosapien? Woman? Superwoman? Jadoo? Hmm..escapes me...

At the end of the day this variety of men are looking girls who will listen to their moms and say haanjee mummmyji, raise the kids, look after the home, cook delicious food, adjust with every tom, dick, and harry, and work outside, and be selfless, and give in to him and his family! Dude!! what are you thinking?? Did you ever think, that women might have a mind and a heart of their own and may not give in to you and your families way of life and thoughts and demands? Did you ever think she might not be interested in the kitchen or socialising with your relatives, because she might be too tired after her long day at work? Did you realise she was human like you? Did you ever think you might be killing her dreams and desires by burdening her with your and your families expectations? Did you ever think you are expecting too much?

Today, many of us teach our daughters to be strong, independent, and make their own choices and decisions in life. So, isn't it natural that when she gets married she will want to have her own seperate home with her husband, run it the way she wants to, live life how she has desired to, take small and big decisions for her home? Why do we forget that women might not like to be burdened with expectations, or might not like joint families, which is already disintegrating very fast. Many free thinking women who chart their own lives, set up nuclear households, take their own decisions, sometimes face family issues and criticism. Now, how sad is that. Isn't this opposite of what we taught them- to be independent? Are we not killing their dreams and right to live happily.

All that women are looking for is just a chance to live their lives and dreams in their own way...to live in peace and love and be loved. Let us not forget there is nothing wrong in a woman demanding the right to lead her life the way she wants to and decide what she wants to do. Indian men, its you turn to wake up and smell the coffee. Women are going way ahead and you need to do some catching up. Get real and decide on what you really want. Usually you can get this or that type or some bit of this and some bit of that...but you cant have it all. Looking for a perfect bride, then just leave it to your mom :) but, if little imperfect would do, that might just make your life happier and complete, then go out and find one for yourself. You will not regret it :)

Got this in my email :)

Life lessons from Dadajaan

I lost my granpa a few months ago. He left me with many memories, which will stay with me forever. Of all the things I have learnt from him, these are special and it is important to me that I document them.

1) I learnt that we must touch each others lives in such a way that we are remembered for it.
Dadajaan, always said, - beta do some small thing for us when you come visiting us, so that when you go away we remember you everyday and say - When Maria was here, she used to do this for us. The small jobs he would entrust me would be giving dadijaan her medicines every night, or giving them a glass of water in the night while going to sleep, or just switching off the light when they have gone to bed.
Sometimes I have done these things, other times I have brushed these jobs away...but now I realize how important these small things were and how much they matter. I really did learn it is important to touch lives and leave a mark. I did learn how small things bring people closer to each other, bind us, and how they help us relate to each other and care for each other.

2) I learnt, it is important to call our special ones lovingly.
Granpa was a polite person and always stressed on using a loving salutation. He introduced me to using the word jaan. So he was Dadajaan for me. So, there was dadijaan, nanajaan, and nanijaan too. Their faces would light up with happiness when we would call them that way :) It would be a special moment to see them happy and smile.
I learnt that it makes a world of difference when we call our special people lovingly. These words effortlessly convey such a warm feeling of love and care. I learnt that words bind us all and the words we use grow on us and shape our feelings and us. Kind words evoke a feeling of love and kindness and help us reciprocate in a similar fashion. How important that is today!

3) I learnt that it is important to express oneself.
Every summer when I would visit them, Dadajaan, would say - beta everyday write a bit on what you did and how you felt. He said it was an enriching experience to express ourself and document our life, thoughts, and feelings and revisit them if we wanted to. So, when I would be there I would write a bit each day in my diary. He would read it with a big smile and talk to me about all that i had written. Sometimes, we would laugh, sometimes we would discuss and I would see reason.
Yes, he taught me that it was important to document our life and thoughts in some way. It was important to revisit them sometimes and see how we think and how far we have gone ahead in life. It helps us to stay rooted and see and analyze life in all its shades. This also made me see the importance of leaving behind a real story for the future generation to simple read or learn from. After dadajaan passed away, I read a few of his diaries that has his life documented in such a rich way. It really is a treasure to cherish that tells the story of a man, his life and times.

I think, sometimes, we just do not realize what we have till it is taken away from us. But, I guess as long as we realize and learn its all worthwhile. He taught me some important life lessons effortlessly by telling me simple things. His words were nothing out of the ordinary, but carried a great message for me.
Thank you for everything dadajaan. A bit of you, lives in me.

Must love dogs!

If there is a dog around, Im at least a mile away for sure. No second thoughts, no love lost...me and dogs are allergic to each other, do not like each other, and shooo each other away instantly! Simple. No dogging around!!

On the other hand, my hubby - T is a strange man! He can almost smell a dog from a mile and in matter of seconds the dog and T are running towards each making those lovey dovey sounds....Gosh! this amazes me no end and i cringe so often. The dog is struggling to get away from his owner's leash towards T and T is reciprocating it equally fast and in a matter of seconds is cuddling the dog, petting him, shaking hands or paws (whatever they have) with the dog!

From the very first day, our neigbour's dog, looks at me and barks/growls and looks at T and goes all cuuddllyyy wuuddlllyyy woooshhhh with tail wagging and licking and all those gestures. I mean how weird is that. ya, ok i must have been mean, paid no attention to that dog on the first day, or made a real bad face at him. But, how do animals sense that we like or dislike them, and they reciprocate those feelings in equal measure. Also, do you know if animals can understand our language? T speaks to the neighbors dog in English, and he seems to respond pretty well and the maid who works at the neighbors house, speaks to the dog in marathi and the dog responds to her too!! So, is this an exceptionally skilled multi lingual dog or all animals are like this? This is so beyond me!

Once at a friends place, their 4 big huge alsatians surrounded hubby and his dad and attacked. Well, they almost tore my FIL's clothes and bit/scratched him at a few places, but didnt even touch T. In fact T and the dogs were civil to each other and they sniffed and licked T. That really amazed everybody, even the guy who had these 4 dogs was astonished, as the dogs were not known for being nice to their visitors.

Even on the streets, dogs like T and follow him. (Already have had 3 dogs that followed T home!). They start wagging their tails and make such a puppy face and T is so so proud of this and one day announced, I must have been a dog in my pichla janam. And I added, yes its more than obvious even in this janam sweetheart :) Nice guy that T is, he smiled and accepted the compliment whole heartedly :)

What's with the weather yaar?

Seriously, whats up with the weather. Today morning its suddenly so dry...has winter set in already or just too much of pollution and heat in the last 2-3 days?  It is so dam dry. Im flaking...my plants are not too happy either :(  But,  I can still hear crackers bursting...cmon people its the 3rd day after Diwali... and its almost 1 in the afternoon. Thoda respite do ab please.

Hubby has already complained that im hard of hearing after these 2 days. Cant help it! the loud noise was just too much for me...Did you see the streets? Gosh! happy diwali to all...but now how about picking up the broom and cleaning the streets. The roads in the society too are strewn with burst crackers. My balcony caught some flying remains of the patakhas and that too is littered...eeewwwww..that so pissed me off!

Junta, a safai abhiyaan is needed - Saathi haath badhana...

How mismatched are you?

They say opposites attract. But, I have never been able to decide or judge this one. Im not sure whether two very different people attract each other or  two like people attract each other or if such things do not matter at all!

At one level I would say why should opposites attract at all? Two people with entirely different set of interests and outlook in life...might not have much in common to get attracted to each other...isnt it? After all life is not all physics. On the other hand I can argue and say two people with like interests might not have much to offer to each other and might bore each other out faster...Strange and confusing...hmmmm.

So, how do we decide what works best for us? I know for example that my hubby and me are different in many many ways, but we are also similar in some ways. So, what does that make out of us? Attracted to each other or not?

Hubby and me have different ways of handling everyday issues and situations, but in the end we both want the same results. He may want to eat chinese and me Italian, but still we both want to have khaana bahar. He watches news and me Bigg Boss, but we still fill up each other on the stories/episodes we saw. He loves electronics and gadget shopping and me clothes, shoes, and ghar ka stuff...but in the end we both love shopping for our home. We have our share of dog and cat fights, but we also love each other. We argue and crib, but we also pamper and spoil each other.We love to disagree with each other, but sometimes we also agree and compromise in between.So, where do we stand? Matched or mismatched?

Maybe the laws of attraction are too simplistic...with 2 polar ends - one saying opposites attract and the other saying like attracts like. Maybe, what works is somewhere in between and depends on many factors- emotions, values, attitudes, beliefs, similarity, differences....

I leave you with this perfect song (lyrics and video) - Opposites Attract by Paula Abdul.
See the video here - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbknGnZXHUk

Baby seems  we never ever agree
You like the movies
And I like T.V.
I take things serious
And you take 'em light
I go to bed early
And I party all night
Our friends are sayin'
We ain't gonna last


Cuz I move slowly
And baby I'm fast
I like it quiet
And I love to shout
But when we get together
It just all work out


I take-2 steps forward
I take-2 steps back
We come together
Cuz opposites attract
And you know-it ain't fiction
Just a natural fact
We come together
Cuz opposites attract


Who'd a thought we could be lovers
She makes the bed
And steals the covers
She likes it neat
And he makes a mess
I take it easy
Baby I get obsessed


She's got the money
And he's always broke
I don't like cigarettes
And I like to smoke
Things in common
Just ain't a one
But when we get together
We have nothin' but fun


I take-2 steps forward
I take-2 steps back
We come together
Cuz opposites attract
And you know-it ain't fiction
Just a natural fact
We come together
Cuz opposites attract


Baby ain't it somethin'
How we lasted this long
You and me
Provin' everyone wrong
Don't think we'll ever
Get our differences patched
Don't really matter
Cuz we're perfectly matched

We've come a long way...

A few days back I was unpacking a suitcase from a recent trip. As I was taking clothes out, I realised this was the same bag that hubby had got from his hometown when we shifted to this new city (where we currently live).

Flashback: Hubby and me shifted to this city about 3+ years back and were just married. We were two lost people who decided to relocate, found jobs for ourselves in this city and arrived here. Hubby landed here with that one suitcase, which had some clothes and shoes. Well, me being a woman had more stuff (men out there don't even try reasoning this out...we women just NEED more things. OK. QED!)

3 + yrs down the line, his suitcase bought back so many memories and how we started our new life with just his 1 bag and some of my stuff. How we went house hunting, from one broker to another to find that one cosy place which we could call home. How we spent our evenings roaming the neighbourhood to see shops and what is available where. We knew absolutely nobody, not a single soul in this city, so things were tough.We googled like crazy to find each and everything we wanted to know about the city and what to buy from where. Our weekends were packed with exploring the city, shops, supermarkets. But, there was so much excitement back then, we were tired each day but we were always still looking forward to the next day and planned for it.

Setting up a house is fun but wears you out. I did things I had never dreamed of. Kitchen was a rather unfamilar territory for me till then. I tried my best to look up recipes to fix some grub. We could not get a gas connection for more than a month, so we had a tough tough time. Aate daal ka bhav pata lag gaya! Gosh! how true is that saying!! Life really makes us do things we never imagined we would! Never in my dreams i thought I would be haggling for aloo and pyaaz and free dhaniya patti. Cmon man! i used to hate those things. If mom ever asked me to get it for her, I would run miles...

Each passing day we realised we needed more things to live comfortably ...the furniture, the electronics, furnishings, kitchen stuff....you name it and we've done it! Its human...we just never stop. One thing leads to the next and so on...our wishes grew, we bought our own cars and our own house.

Today: when I look around, I see a whole big functioning, kicking home that we both have built for ourself. Our needs and fancies and nakhras kept growing each day. Now, we have people who help us run our home. The cook, the maid, the car wash guy, newspaperwallah, doodhwalah...everybody does their bit to make our home functional. We both are doing our bit. We come home to each other tired in the evenings and still talk about whats the next plan. Hubby makes sure im always on my toes. He is a spontaneous guy so that keeps the spark glowing and the mind ticking each day. Else, I would have had a numb mind after all the circus in the last 3 years!

In 3 years our life has completely changed! But, I wouldnt want it any other way! It would be too boring and bland. Setting up each and everything yourself and taking all your decisions yourself is such a high and a great life changing experience.

Today that one suitcase has grown so much, i couldnt have ever imagined. For us our home is the center of our lives right now. It is our action packed world. Who could have ever imagned what one suitcase can lead you to in life. But, we still have miles to go before we sleep....

In the fast lane...

So, which lane do you drive in?
Right most...the fast lane? Is there anybody, anybody at all who uses another lane? Like the middle or the left lane?
No, we all love life in the fast lane and you may be on cycle, bus, car, bike, rick...any dam thing...9 out of 10 times you are in the right lane.

My sore point are the 2 wheeler guys in this city. All of them, just all... are driving in the right lane at maybe 30 or in the middle of the road, and you honk once and it has absolutely no effect on them. Not a muscle moves. And their special trait is you honk once dheere se requesting them---bhai sahab side de do...but that man is not moving and when you somehow dodge other vehicles and overtake from the wrong side, the 2 wheeler guy will scorn, give you the dirtiest look...and i just wonder...excuse me? weren't you supposed to move when i honked! why the hell are you even looking at me now! Oh! they force me to hurl the choicest of abuses.

These days im loosing it more and more while driving. Can we have citizen policing? Like I could report all trouble makers on the road breaking traffic rules or better still beat them up? Maybe at least show a fist to the pedestrians who prefer to walk in the middle of the road with their cellphones stuck to their ear. For god sake, you are on the road, and one of us is going to run over you! If not about yourself think abut the trouble I would have to go through for knocking you out!

Oh! as you can sense im so exasperated...and don't even make me get started about women driving 2 wheelers...they are the worst.

Happy 50th bday Doordarshan!

Good ol Doordarshan turns 50 today...its been a long long run for it...and when I look back it makes me smile. DD holds a special place in my heart and my childhood memories are full of my fav DD shows.


Flashback: The GEMS OF DD
Remember when we used to get up on Sundays at 9am to watch Ramayan and Mahabharat...The entire neighborhood would be silent, everybody would be huddled up in their or their neighbours houses watching the epic. Sundays would also not be complete without Rangoli. We would wait and hope yaar aaj electricity nahi jaaye please god.

I never wanted to miss jungle book - jungle jungle baat chali hai pata chala hai, chaddhi pahan ke phool khila hai-phool khila hai... The popularity of this song is sooo sooo much that even today so many of us remember or hum it off and on. I even call one of my cats Mowgli.



My favourite ek chidiya anek chidiya and mile sur mera tumhara toh sur bane hamara. This was one video which always had me glued to the TV.






And of course Malgudi Days...Tana na tana na re...what music...and such simple stories but what an impact. What a following it enjoyed. The episodes took us right to the heart of South India.



Arey haan and Karamchandddd..with "sir your a genius" and "shut up kitty" and that gajar :) Do you remember how eagerly we used to wait for ' Vikram Vikram Vikram Vetal Vetal Vetal' with Arun Govil as Vikram & Liliput as Vetal. (Just last month I spoted a 10 CD pack of Vikram Betal at Crossword and quickly picked it up) And not to forget DD ka fav programme, which could be on anytime for however long - Rukawat ke liye khed hai :)

For us Indians some of the first soaps - Hum Log, Ye Jo Hai Zindagi, Buniyaad..nanhe, chutki, haveli ram. Those charaters will stay a lifetime with us. Then we had some memorable and historic serials like Tamas, Chanakya, Bharat Ek Khoj. Can any of us ever forget them? They dont make stuff like that anymore...what a pity!



And are you one of those who lost their heart to Salma Sultan? One of the first female news readers. That pretty face gave lots of viewers to News.

And i remember as a kid when DD went color...i think it was after/during the Asiad games...i remember watching it with a few neighbours and we all went waaahhh...color...and all we saw while tuning it were the color bands and we were so excited. And then there would be somebody on the terrace adjusting the antenna and we kids shouting from the drawing room....haan ho gaya...nahi thoda aur ghumao...haan abhi picture aa gayi :)



Gosh! its been a long long time...and in the last 30 yrs of my existence lots has changed...but that old world charm of DD still remains...Even today I would rush to hear/see - mile sur mera tumahara! DD thanks for entertaining a nation when there was nothing else to entertain us. Thanks DD for those evergreen gems you came up with. Thanks for giving me so many memories to lookback. DD you are the bestest ever and we love you. Tum jiyo hazaaron saal.

What you do with your money is only your business

Austerity is the buzz word these days...Why is there such a big debate if 2 of our rich ministers were staying in 5 star hotels for the last 3 months and footing the bills themselves, out of their own pockets. So what? they have the money, they are rich and they want to live the life they like or are used to. They have the right to splurge their own money. Why should I, you, or any Tom, Dick, or Harry be bothered? Don't we all have a right to earn and spend our own money.

If we have to be bothered, we should be bothered about how and where the tax payers money is being spent. Is a 350 crore Shivaji statue really needed? Should we give away public funds to Mayawati to build her statues? Do we really have to pay for netas Z category security? Isn't your and my life as important as theirs? I am concerned why the exchequer has to pay for our netas and their families holidaying abroad.
Also, check out this post on how tax payers money is being abused.

If there has to be a debate, they should focus on issues that really concern the junta and how and where public funds are being spent. Citizens should have the right to ask and question any misuse of tax payers money. We give our money to the govt for the greater good of the nation. For better roads, educational institutes, infrastructure, border security. And we should be empowered to monitor all such initiatives.


But in our personal lives, what we do with our own money, where we eat, live, study, party out of our own money is our choice and our business...may it be you, me, a politician, a bollywood star...whoever.

I believe - have money...will spend :)